On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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