i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
