My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize