he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize