dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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