my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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