How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
