Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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