Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
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