I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
