i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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