in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
