i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
should my penis look like a turkey
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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