STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
