Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
