i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
