Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
