Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
