There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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