so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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