Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
