i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
This is the prime rib incident all over again
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
