dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
