Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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