Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
