Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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