Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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