no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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