..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
did i walk over a car last night?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You pole danced in your parka.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
