We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
