If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
