We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize