All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
