can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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