Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
