I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
