it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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