Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
