she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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