Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize