Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
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