the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
you made out with another girl for some wings
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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