do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize