why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
