doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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