why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
