Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I want a musical about memes.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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