I'm eating all of the evidence.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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