woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
