I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
