You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
